Stop Comparing and Move Ahead

It's been a whirlwind trying to figure out what I wanted to do in life and the things that I've been doing now. I just feel so uneasy, so unsure. I don't know what's really missing but I'm sure I'm gonna find out soon.

I pretty much wanted to do two (2) things:

1. go to Law School [Yes, I really do. It frustrates me. Haha]

You can read this article to understand my story about going to law school:http://frommybeautifulmind.blogspot.com/2011/10/my-results-day-look-and-lot-about-law.html

2. work for a company that allowed me to wear colorful dresses and outfits once in a while [Yes. Like high heels, colorful tank tops and blazers. Name it and I wanna wear it!]

Perhaps, after having heard the things I had just said, you'd think I'm crazy.

But really? I'm not. It took me a couple of years to finally realize that that's all I wanna be. Marriage would then set in later. Hahaha.

I just know what I want and I want either of those 2 things first and then pursue the other.

However, much as I'd like to do number 1, I can't.

I can't due to some personal reasons, which-- if I reveal them here-- would make the other person involved seem like a villain in my heroic life.

Thus, I share to you this simple inspirational passage by Daniell Koepke:

"Stop comparing where you're at with where everyone else is. It doesn't move you farther ahead, improve your situation or help you find peace. It just feeds your shame, fuels your feelings of inadequacy and ultimately, it keeps you stuck. The reality is that there is no one correct path in life. Everyone has their own unique journey. A path that's right for someone else won't necessarily be a path that's right for you. And that's okay. Your journey isn't right or wrong, or good or bad.It's just different. Your life isn't meant to look like someone else's because you aren't like anyone else. You're a person all your own with a unique set of goals, obstacles, dreams and needs. So stop comparing and start living. You may not have ended up where you intended to go. But trust, that for once, you have ended up where you needed to be. Trust that you are in the right place at the right time. Trust that your life is enough. Trust that you are enough."

Have a nice day! :)

West Visayas State University: 2nd Top Performing Nursing School in the Philippines

It's really true that you don't really know what you got until it's gone. My high school days were, for me, the hardest yet the happiest time in my life. It was a combination of extremes when it came to burning midnight oils and enjoying what life had to offer as a teenager.

I stayed up late at night studying and there are still times right now when I don't want to remember how there used to be an exam for every subject from 7AM to 5:30 PM, but boy was it fun! Haha.

Anyway, I took the Nursing Aptitude Test (NAT) at the West Visayas State University and luckily passed. I don't know how I did it, but yeah I passed. Then, it was time to take those tortuous interviews where the interviewers pretended to be really rude. Weak souls got no place in those interview rooms, baby. If your mom and dad simply pushed you into it and you fear that you might just say something you might regret then, I suggest you back off.

I had to deal with clinical instructors pushing me to not attend nursing in their school. Instead, they convinced me to take up medicine [my one great love at that time]. It was not surprising for them not to know the latest trend in Med School since the two buildings- nursing and medicine- were just a few blocks away from each other and that our clinical instructors weren't stupid individuals not able to watch TV and hear the news.

To keep it short and simple, I was successfully admitted as a nursing student and passed four long years of tiring studying and cramming. Haha. Crazy seminars, unbeatable deadlines, strict teachers and fun activities. I enjoyed them all.

Ahh... Those were the days. Anyway, going back... I present to you something that makes my heart skip with joy. This was the latest result for the Top Performing Nursing Schools in the Philippines. Can't believe we had the 2nd slot. This is not so surprising [I'm not bragging though] since our school has always been part of the top ten ever since. Sometimes I couldn't believe I used to be and graduated from that school. Sometimes, it's all surreal. When people keep praising our school, I feel really proud inside but I pretend to be cold and unappreciative on the outside. Hahaha. Must be some form of coping. 

To sum it all up, we ranked second and we got five students on the top ten examinees for last July 2012's NLE (with their corresponding places and marks) namely:

              (3) WAYNE STEVEN MIRANDA ZAMORA - 85.20

            (5) JOENER BALEDIATA BANGERO - 84.80

            (6) VINIE OBERIANO OBERIANO - 84.60

            (9) JANE THERESE DE LA ROSA DORILAG - 84.00 

           (10) KARL JAYSON GENTUGAO CAÑETE - 83.80

I'm so proud and happy. Keep it up! :)

Party Animals Despite Earthquake Intensity 6.9

Lyle, Me and Chloe

I was having a class with my student on the 4th floor when all of a sudden we felt an earthquake move our table back and forth. It lasted for a few seconds and I must admit that it was one of the scariest earthquakes I have ever experienced in my entire life.It was even scarier than experiencing air pocket while on a plane in a windy or stormy weather.

I had to calm down and slowly tell my not-so-surprised student that we were experiencing earthquake at that time. When the shaking didn't stop when I thought it would already, I asked her to slowly go down the table and cover our heads.

I didn't think of getting her outside the classroom because I was thinking of scenes in the movies 2012 and The Day After Tomorrow where the ground would suddenly crack open and swallow people alive. I was so scared and I just prayed and prayed for our safety.

(L to R) Rex, Me, Lyle, Tom, Angelie, Vito, Stephanie and Erl in that red shirt

After the shaking stopped, I asked her to run outside and go to the first floor where we saw everyone else standing and talking loudly about what happened. Most of our students are Koreans and they were so shocked because they have never experienced an earthquake their entire lives and to think that it had a magnitude of 6.9.

We stood and waited outside until we were all signaled to come back inside. Some teachers and I ate outside and we experienced an aftershock. I was so scared already but I tried my best to keep it under 

After lunch, we had a meeting and it was decided that classes would be suspended because of the incident. I was scared but I thought it would be wiser to stay with my friends. I thought, I didn't want to die alone sitting inside a jeepney with some passengers whom I didn't know.

It was so funny how we finally decided to go to Smallville instead of going back to our homes. Eventhough the aftershock was over, I still felt scared especially I couldn't help but worry for my Mama and Papa.

Nanako, Lyle, Chloe and I decided to think about what just happened at Coffeebreak while others decided to look for a place where they could drink and have fun. I really felt guilty because I knew I had to be at home with my parents but I also didn't want to go home alone and so I just stayed with them. I thought I'd feel better dying with them than dying alone.

Death was one thing I kept on thinking at that time although  know it was not a good thing to think of. I was just so scared and I could still feel my adrenalin rushing after 2 hours or so.

Errol and Me

Nanako, a Japanese student manager, kept on insisting that things would be okay. I'm such a transparent person and I find it really difficult to hide what I really feel. Thus, I know she saw how worried I was. Chloe [the Korean Junior Camp Teacher/ Student] on the other hand, showed such bravery and composure. It was as if nothing happened. She was just smiling even when she read messages from family and friends who were very worried about her and her condition in Iloilo.

I know these pictures may seem inappropriate but I hope you see it in a different light. We were trying or should I say... I was trying to pretend to be enjoying while my head was filled with thoughts of my family members especially those living in Cebu.

However, we were all able to overcome our fear with utmost happiness. We went home feeling a little less scared and very happy. Filipinos are really damn good at making something good out of something very terrible or should I say disastrous?

Writing From the Heart

I always find refuge in writing. It's the most powerful tool to simply express yourself without hesitation. It's the best way to badmouth someone without having to lose your temper and manners.

The past two weeks had been one of the most difficult times in my life. It was 14 days of emotional ups and downs. I broke up with my boyfriend and I felt a little empty. I cried for maybe five minutes and I realized I should put it to an end. There was no use crying over something that was simply not meant to be.

For months [even way before we broke up], I had been feeling alone. And what difference did it make now that we weren't together? I realized that life really is what you make it. You always hold the key to your happiness and if you want to be sad, then you will be. If you choose to be happy, you will always find several reasons to smile. If you choose to see black when it's all colorful and vibrant, it will simply be how you think of it.

It's just so funny now that I came to understand that the reason why I was so sad before [during my first heartbreak] was because I put too much emphasis on 'who I was not'. I always felt so small and little. Sometimes, even if there were so many chances and opportunities to laugh, I never took it. I always dwelt on the bad side and my life really fell apart. But the good thing was, I was able to pick up the pieces and start over again. 

Along the way, I met a lot of people. Some were simply passers by while others stayed for good. Those who stayed, continue to strengthen me up to this very day.

Well, here I am choosing to be happy amidst the confusion inside my head. I have come to realize that in my 18 months of being in the relationship, I have been living my life alone-- battling alone. When I had problems, I never really had someone who helped me ease the pain. I only had myself to help me heal the wounds, to help me patch things up and stand up again. Don't get me wrong. I loved him but I grew tired of loving someone who couldn't simply show you how important you were to him.

Now, all I know is I don't want to be in a relationship for a very long time. I want to be single and get myself on track before dealing with love again. I want to be halfway my goals and dreams, and right now there's this one guy who inspires me to work even harder.

I don't know how this will work especially that I never told him how I felt for him. Well, why should I? I'm a woman. Therefore, he should go after me and I think it would be such a shame for me to be telling him how I feel. I guess I will never get the chance to tell him. I guess it will be forever locked up inside.

He's very far from me now like oceans apart. I only wish I could see him again the moment he comes back. Now, all I have of him are memories to keep me smile. I will always remember the way he laughs and shakes his legs like a child just because he thinks something's really really funny.

I will always remember the way his eyes would shut close each time he smiles and the way he would look at me with such tenderness.

A Walk to Remember

Hello! I just wanna tell you that I just finished reading the book, "A Walk to Remember" yesterday. I know. I know it's kind of late-- as in very late-- but I just read it because I had no other better thing to do. And since it's a Nicholas Sparks I thought I might give it a try.

I thought it was like the movie and since I've seen the movie when I was in high school I might just forget about the thought of reading it. But I was wrong! Very wrong. 

I must admit. The movie by Mandy Moore made me cry but the book?! Unstoppable! Like just imagine me trying to hold back tears while talking to my mom facing the window so she couldn't see me crying. So you might tell me, "Heck! Why didn't you just put the book down?"

Well, I couldn't. I tried to put it down to stop my tears from falling but I ended up wanting to finish the book up to the end. It was a surge of emotions and even if I had placed it down, I would surely cry thereafter.

I like this passage in the Bible so much. I hope my husband would read me this.

This was one of my favorite lines. Thus, the photograph.

Merry Christmas!

Hello, everyone! Wishing you the best Christmas ever! Well, this photo was taken at SM City here in Iloilo. I had a busy day that day considering that I had been walking and strolling the entire day from like 9AM to 6PM. Whew!

That's my adopted [though not legally] brother, Rafhael, 

my father and my mom. So you know where I got my looks, huh?

Hmm... I must tell you that I was born to a Catholic mother and a father who has this religion of [I don't know the denomination!]. Simply put, he's a Christian. I know we all are, but it's non-Catholic so some people have this notion of referring to them as Christians, if you know what I mean.

This one's kinda dark. 'Twas too late when I figured out my father used the flash.

Strolling, Nail Art and Food Tripping

Hmm… Have you ever experienced feeling like the ‘day’ was so looong? I mean, the one you feel when you’ve done a lot of things in a short period of time.

Wearing Allen's hat... Haha.

Well, this was one of those days and I ended up sitting on the benches of every shoe store while my father and mother had to look for the right kind of shoes they wanted to buy and it was only 6:00 PM. I didn’t want to buy shoes. As for me, I had just bought shoes the other month and I’ve been trying to be my best spendthrift possible! Haha.

This is Grace, my Taiwanese student.

Well, let me begin by telling you that what was just supposed to be a day to a salon turned out to be one day of a heck! My Taiwanese student, Grace, asked me to accompany her and a friend to the salon, so they can had both their nails and toenails cleaned and ‘nail-art-ed’ for that matter.

Black base

I really liked this one!

Good to Have Them Around

Lia and Cherry are my trusted friends. Oh! Don’t get me wrong. They’re not the only friends I trust. Of course I have a few others but they’re the two who always keep their promises no matter what. Having them as friends make me feel like I have this “sense of direction” in my life.

I always look up to them. Aside from the fact that they’re very smart and beautiful individuals, I think I owe them a lot for getting me back on track and listening to me whenever I’m down and need someone to talk to.

They’re my source of strength and the persons I get energy from and the drive to keep me going.

Lia, by the way, is taking up Medicine. So maybe after 3 more years from now, I might be calling her Dr. Delfin. She’s got a popular blog entitled “What, Where and Wearabouts”.

This blog showcases her love for fashion and her unique sense of style. Also, you’ll find many interesting things about her family, her other ‘loves’ and more about who she really is.

Cherry on the other hand is pursuing the nursing career. She’s been volunteering for 9 straight months now and she’s really doing well. Unlike me, she continues to believe that volunteering will make her reach her dreams and aspirations.

Oh well. Here I am feeling a little confused about what career to pursue. After an interview with the dean for having been on the waitlist after getting a score of 61 on the abstract reasoning [Haha!], the dean has finally allowed me to defer my enrolment for the next school year provided that I comply with their list of requirements.

Anyway, my mom doesn’t want me to take up law anymore and I’m on the verge of breaking down. Haha. Really. I don’t have a choice but I’ll continuing praying because if it’s for me, it will happen.

Not Too Late

I was browsing through some of my files when I saw these! Ahh! This was taken last November 1, 2011 at Robinson’s Mall. There was a contest for the different categories for Halloween costumes.

Some were so scary. Some were funny but nonetheless they looked like they’re really going on a Halloween costume party.

This is just going to be a brief photo blog. Hope you like it!

T.G.I.F.

I didn't expect much from my day today but I really had a lot of fun. It's Friday and of course, it's FREE day. Me and my students get the chance to choose whether to have a class or not.

I spent almost the entire morning watching movies, but there's no subtitles! This makes it all difficult for students to understand. Their listening skills will surely be put to the test.

Picture-taking for IDs. Hahaha.

Triple Treat!

Well, let me begin by telling you that today is November 11, 2011 [11-11-11], considered perhaps the luckiest day for the year 2011. Also, today is the famous Pepero Day in Korea, so many students were giving us Peperos. They’re [straight] pretzels coated with chocolate, nuts or both. I was lucky enough to have received 2 Peperos coated with chocolate and almond bits. Tastes really good!

Pepero for Sir Larry and not for me...

Tradition has it that the company, Lotte, introduced the exchange of Peperos to Koreans. Some Japanese know about this special day in Korea but they seldom or perhaps never practice this good gesture of giving.

Giving Peperos is most especially common among couples— to express their love for one another. However, anyone can buy and give Pepero to whomever the person pleases. Some students say that this celebration has a commercial agendum and that is tricking Koreans into buying Peperos to increase the company’s sales.

New Environment at NEO International Language Center

I must tell you that I'm no longer volunteering as a nurse trainee at our school's hospital. Instead, I now work as an English teacher at the NEO International Language Center.

This was me holding a string during our Halloween Party.

I find the place really nice! I'm with my best bud, Hannah and a co-teacher I have met [because we had the same day of interview and orientattion] Lyle.

There's always an activity every month for students.

So, I'm going to tour you a little bit to the place and show you just how happy I am to be surrounded by friendly, sincere and honest people. Well, here goes...

This is the 3rd floor and as you can see there's a big sign which says "English Zone". Even at this area, students and teachers are very much encouraged to speak English.

And this is because I thought you wanted another angle of the place. Haha.

New Pair of Wedge Sandals at Php 99

Who said you couldn't buy a pair of new wedges at Php 99? Haha. Yes, I just did after a three-day sale at a mall nearby and I was sooo happy to have bought it at the cheapest price ever!

Mendrez beige wedge sandals

But I do have to tell you that it's got a little discoloration on the inside part of the wedge. It's very minimal and I guess anyone would buy it at that price. I was to purchase this pair of wedges for my photo shoot at Guimaras Island but was not able to. Instead, I bought a different pair to match the color of my outfit for the shoot.

Surprisingly Sweet

Buto't Balat Restaurant

I went to have my final interview at a language center here and I must tell you that it was the shortest interview I had ever undergone in my entire life. I’m not telling you this because it was short and simple. It was short and very brief but the questions came like bullets from a machine gun— short, concise and very straightforward.

Then in less than 10 minutes, we were done and I was asked to wait for a confirmation via sms. I went out to close the door, thinking what I was to do next. The interview went so swiftly and before I knew it, I was out closing the door and walking down the building.

While walking, I was thinking through all the questions that had been thrown at me. I was wondering what had probably gone wrong because the interview was so short. Maybe they didn’t want me! I had no experience whatsoever in teaching. I may not have been qualified. So, I began to text Hannah that the interview was incredibly over in less than 10 minutes.